No two cats are the same, but an awful lot of them are
very similar. Faced with an inward-opening door, most will press
their nose against it and decline to back up. Our little ginger will
indicate a food bowl needs topping up, but then is in such a hurry
that only the first few biscuits make it into the bowl, with the rest
bouncing off her ears. As for pointing – you can’t point to
something for a cat’s attention, because they stare at your moving
finger.
Then there’s Piper, six and a half kilos of black-and-white, ex-feral
tom cat, the cat with a difference. Actually, multiple differences.
Just like any of our cats, he will sit and stare pointedly at a door,
expecting it to be opened, even if there is a perfectly functional
cat-flap. Just because he can go through without troubling his
people doesn’t mean that he should. And then when you open
the door, he actually steps back, if necessary giving an
impatient stare if the gap isn’t wide enough fast enough. This is
not what I regard as conventional cat behaviour.
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| Piper (rear) and Oatmeal, or Heavy and Heavier. |
As for the food-bowl... We have a diet arrangement,
because although Oatmeal is now down from being a seven-kilo bundle
of fluff, he still needs calorie control. The high-calorie food is in
a bowl on a window cill on the principal that when Oatmeal is light
enough to jump that high, he’s allowed the good stuff. Piper, who
may now actually be heavier than Oatmeal, can jump that high. In
fact, he tries to lead his people round there so that if the bowl is
inadequate once he’s up, the service staff are on hand to fix it.
Unlike Ginge, he sits back and waits for the filling to be done –
no kitty-nibbles bouncing off his ears.
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| Piper with a book - he can't read, but it adds an air of sophistication |
In fact, Piper also has his own unique set of
communications and processes for ensuring the correct level of
service. Perhaps the most notable is I want something.
Casual but persistent stropping round ankles usually
means walk with me to the window and attend to that food bowl.
That’s just the basic brush-past, not that different from what the
other cats do.
There are higher, more aggressive levels.
After brush-past is figure-of-eight, which is fast and
sufficient to upset my balance. It starts with a more forceful
brush-past, which is noticeable from a tall, six and a half kilo cat, and then a quick turn to make another pass, then turn again to come
back. It’s like being buffeted by waves on a sea shore. It usually
happens when I’m cooking and the approximate translation is I
really want that, whatever it is, put some down and let’s find out
if I like it.
Then there is a heavy-treading variant of the
figure-of-eight, which usually means I already know I like that
stuff, put some down. It’s a slower cycle which goes something
like this: step up, stand on the human’s foot, brush past, beat the
shins vigorously with the tail, step down, turn and repeat. It’s
surprisingly uncomfortable when Piper puts most of his weight on one
paw on my foot. The furry truncheon makes an impact as well.
Finally, there are the two absolute-extreme-urgent put
that stuff down for me now signals. First, there’s the
scratching post, the sharp attention-grabber. Reach up, rest paws
against the human’s knee, extend claws and pull down, adjusting
grip like playing with that that rope-covered post that's been mauled almost bare.
Secondly, there’s the culmination of the
heavy-treading figure of eight. This final trick is where the
repeated impacts makes the human move, creating just enough space for
the Piper-nose to pass between the legs, and then work like a wedge
until the rather wider waist can follow through. In the most extreme
version, the front paws can hold down one of the human’s feet, and
then the tail starts lashing – not a genteel waft but laying it
about with the furry truncheon, swaying hips to get the motion going
– more like a dog wagging its tail – until the human’s knees
are ready to buckle.
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| Just a normal cat, really. |
I don’t always understand what he wants, and I would
love to point out to Piper that sometimes he mixes his signals. I
know what the answer would be. Understanding is not required, just
prompt obedience.
Of course, I can’t point anything out to Piper. For
all his differences he’s just like any other cat when you try to
point, staring at the finger and wondering what new game is about to
start.
